Sports FOOTBALL All on board for lazy stereotypes and criticism of...

All on board for lazy stereotypes and criticism of the ending

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BUBBLE burst?

Between England’s inevitable Wembley showdown against Germany on Sunday and today’s long-awaited outcome of Wagat Christie’s libel trial, these are serene days for women in football. But in a week in which the legacy – or lack of it – of the most jingoistic, smug opening ceremony in Olympic history has been in the news spotlight, it seems more important than ever before that the English women’s game continues to bring hay. while the sun shines on their sport.

You see, various cousins ​​of the Five cheer for the plucky English lionesses ahead of the Wembley final, with a few notable exceptions. By a handful, we mean everyone except our English cousin Repressed Morris Dancing Fives, whose offer of additional tickets to the final for various relatives was turned down.

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Much to his chagrin, Theme Pub O’Fiver’s stereotypical Irish cousin brandishing a stick; the bagpipe-playing “See you Jimmy” Scottish cousin Shortbred MacPhyver and the valley-dwelling, cheese-on-toast Welsh cousin Llanfairpullgwingillgogerichvirndrobulllantisiliogogogoh Five seemed surprisingly unenthusiastic about accompanying him to the game, and when asked why they embarrassedly admitted they had a better offer. Instead of punching thick lines and sticking firecrackers where the sun doesn’t shine, they will instead make noise at the far end of the Wembley with their ruthlessly efficient German cousin Vorsprung durch Tin und Lederhosen Fumfen.

At the other end of a five filled with lazy stereotypes, Franz Beckenbauer did his part to destroy the Lionesses narrative by offering his compatriots victory in the most banal style imaginable. The German legend expects Alexandra Popp and her pals to shed light on any supposed English Wembley parade by not only winning the final, but doing so on penalties.

“A draw after 90 minutes,” he predicted. “In extra time, both teams score one goal each. Penalty. And our women benefit from this, because they are physically and mentally better.” While his comments would probably look good on the England dressing room wall, the ongoing concern of Repressed Morris Dancing Fiver and other English fans is that history suggests he is probably right.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“I will not eat brie. It’s a waste of cheese, isn’t it? Waste of cheese,” Rotherham United boss Paul Warne discusses the big issues in getting the league season ready to kick off.

“Cheese Waste”, formerly. Photo: Anna Blazhuk/Getty Images

RECOMMENDED LISTENING

Find out more about the Women’s Football Weekly bonus issue right here.

FIVE LETTERS

“I may be living in a bien-pensant bourgeois bubble, but I haven’t really come across any sarcasm or sarcasm about the euro. So the tone of the recent Fivers (and the really big coverage) seems weird and overly defensive, and anyway people who need to be chastised won’t read, will they? Can we just enjoy it without feeling the need to respond to idiots every time we talk about it?” — Nick Wiltshere.

“You claimed that England took advantage of the early advantage by choosing a white uniform over the German green (yesterday’s Fiver). May the memory of Günther Netzer not be shaken. As a schoolboy, I remember how 50 years ago he commandeered the midfield of England in his green shirt. ”- Paul Jennison.

“Jens Lehmann took a chainsaw to his neighbor’s house? (yesterday’s five). Relax friend. Could be much worse— Mike Wilner.

Send email to the.boss@theguardian.com. And you can always tweet The Fiver via @guardian_sport. Today’s winner of our no-prize letter of the day is… Rollover.

NEWS, BITS AND BEANS

Aymeric Laporte will miss the Community Shield and six weeks of the season at Manchester City due to knee surgery.

Meanwhile, Jurgen Klopp has shown he understands how football works, as he said he wouldn’t wallow in poverty after losing the Big Cup and the Premier League last season. “This is a sport and we accept the rules,” he blabbed. “After 38 days of play, one point is enough, and one more goal is enough in the game.”

Everton striker Ellis Simms traded Goodison Park to the Stadium of Light in search of more first-team experience, signing a season-long loan deal with Sunderland. “He’s a big guy, straight forward, fast and mobile – and he was a serial goalscorer,” Sunderland boss Alex Neill tweeted.

“Serial scorer” gets to work. Photo: Ian Horrocks/Sunderland AFC/Getty Images,

Hat advice to West Ham for opening a London stadium for the homelessproviding clothing, hairdressers, dental checkups, bank support, and mashed potatoes.

And Brighton’s Mark Cucurella slammed Graham Potter’s beard over a transfer request in the hope that it would spur a move to the Etihad Stadium.

DO YOU WANT MORE?

The countdown continues to the final of the Women’s European Championship between England and Germany. Nick Ames explains why this is the perfect matchup. Our writers have the tools to let readers tell us what they’ve done with the euro. It turns out they enjoyed it. And Leah Williamson was the main defender of the England team. without tackle manufacturing.

Huddersfield will start their league campaign against Burnley tonight. Will Unwin spoke with Jem Karakan and Dimi Konstantinopoulos about how teams can bounce back from their disappointment in the playoff finals. Meanwhile, Andy Hunter is watching Vincent Kompany’s Burnley recover from relegation from the Premier League.

Vincent Kompany
But will Vincent Kompany get a pub named after him? Photograph: Paul Greenwood/CameraSport/Getty Images

Ben Fischer also lurked in the second tier to have a little chat with QPR boss Michael Beal about his footballer brother Steven Gerrard.

Get Ready for the Premier League next week with our previews of Fulham and Leeds.

North of the border, Ewen Murray thinks Queen’s Celtic or Papa’s Newke O’Rangers will be in charge of the title.

Get your share of The Rumor Mill transfer rumors.

And if it’s your business… you can follow a big website in a big social FaceSpace. As well as INSTACHAT, TOO!

RIVALS, READY?



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